~WEDNESDAY WISDOM~

~WEDNESDAY WISDOM~

I decided to write a letter to my 15 year old self, here goes.

Dear 15 year old me,

I know that today is difficult and all you want to do is fit in, be pretty and thin and have fun (oh and that boy to ask you out).  School work seems pointless and Mom & Dad seem totally stupid.  Here is some wisdom gained by your 43 year old self......

Love fearlessly, but honestly.  Don't let anyone put you down, hold you down or make you feel smaller than you are.  You are beautiful.  You are kind.  You are smart.  You are important.  If you don't take care of yourself no one else will!  

Family is the most important support system you will ever have, make it strong, make it a priority and it will never fail you.  Always, always, always treat others the way you would want to be treated.  Never never never judge someone else.  Everyone is fighting their own battles (and most of them you will never see) so be of kind heart. 

 Be open to new experiences but not afraid of them.  Laugh more, love more, dance more.  Not everyone will agree with decisions you make, but if you made them for the right reasons (and only you will know if you did) then stand by them.  If you didn't then it's never to late to change your mind - EVER!

When you become a mom (and you will) everything your parents ever did for you will take on a new meaning and importance.  You will understand why they did everything they did and finally appreciate them and all they did for you!  And that will make you an amazing mom (even though at times you will question this).

I love you -  life will be beautiful if you only stop to smell the flowers, dance in the rain, and laugh often.

Sincerely,

43 year old me

******************************************************************

What would you tell your 15 year old self if given the chance?

~WEDNESDAY WISDOM~

 My rambling thoughts for the week.....

~WEDNESDAY WISDOM~

Working mom's are in a tough spot, even in this "advanced"day and age.

We are judged, questioned, guilt ridden (right up there with "Catholic Guilt"), 

unappreciated and/or under-appreciated and the list goes on.   

Don't judge, it hurts us all.  As my mother says "don't judge others 

until you walk a mile in their shoes"!

***************************

There are very few things that we have control over.  

I call it "your circle"....you are the only thing in your circle is YOU. 

Therefore the only thing you can control is YOU; 

your actions, your reactions, your respect for other, 

the caring and compassion you have, and your words.  

***************************

The Dictionary defines respect as:  

"A feeling of deep admiration for someone or something 

elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements."  

I disagree with this definition - to me respect means 

"allowing others their own opinions, values 

and ideals without judgement or degradation"

We need to respect each others differences and opinions, 

we DO NOT have to agree with them, or stand behind them or support them, 

but we do need to allow them.  

The caveat with this is that there are those who use this definition 

for their own evil ideals - 

where is that line drawn and who has the responsibility 

(note I did not say privilege) of drawing it?  

You?  Me?  Government?  God?  

***************************

Sleep WHAT??? et duex

Part two of the sleep drama unfolding in my household.

As you hopefully already read about the observation part of my sleep study I won't bore you with too many details of the testing phase.  The testing phase is where they hook you up to all of the wires (yes AGAIN with the brain waves look) but this time they have you try all different masks and head gear for the CPAP which you get to sleep with while they play with the air pressure all night to find the correct setting/parameters!  

The CPAP is a "continuous positive airway pressure" machine that forces air into your airway so you can sleep without interruption caused by UARS (Upper Airway Resistance Syndrome), sleep apnea, snoring etc.....I'll spare you the details and just say that after a LOONNNG night falling asleep around 2-3am I now have a Bi-PAP machine.

I didn't know there was such a machine.  

The air pressure required on the CPAP to stop my UARS was about 11-12 but when I exhaled I would fight the pressure of the air.  At 3am they switched me to a Bi-PAP.  The Bi-PAP has two air pressure settings one for inhalation (higher) and one for exhalation (lower) which worked perfectly.

So I now have a  pink headband that holds a nose pillow (no kidding that's what they call it) on my face, that is connected by a very long tube to my Bi-PAP machine.  I kind of look like a Dr. Seuss character with a long snout. 

We've named the machine Edna, for some reason it seems to fit. 

Thankfully the puppy isn't bothered by the machine (it's actually quieter than my floor fan) so he still snuggles with me.  I on the other hand am having a hard time adjusting to sleeping with this mask on....it's been almost a week now and I only woke up 2 or 3 times last night.  I'll keep trying - may need to try a different mask as the pillows seem to move around and then I feel like I'm suffocating and I think that is NOT the point!

So sweet dreams to all and to all a good night.................................