Advice....

Do you ever wonder if the advice you give is good?  Is it helpful or hurtful?  Who am I to be giving advice anyway?


I have an old friend (not old age wise but old in the fact that I've known her for a very very long time - since early grade school in fact).  We were college roommates for a short time, she married someone right out of college and settled down.  At the time I was extremely jealous of her family and her love.  At this point we lost touch.  Meanwhile I went through a few serious relationships that ended in heart break.  As well, I went through many lonely, sad times, however through those times I developed a sense of security and confidence. I learned how to be alone with myself, it wasn't easy, but looking back it was necessary.  I will never again have fear of being alone, either physically and emotionally.

The reason I tell you all this is because this old friend is seeking my advice and I wonder if I am being helpful or hurtful. 

We joke that she is going through now (post divorce) what I went through in college.  The dating scene, the questioning mens motives, their intentions.  I've come to realize that while I (hopefully) am helping her through her rough times and I am also reliving them through her.  I feel the pain she feels, the uncertainty, and the doubt and I think it makes me a better friend and wife.  I love her dearly and I have complete confidence that she will navigate this new path with dignity and compassion, with or without my advice.  I feel extremely  honored that she asks my advice, I truly do and I want to thank her (yes YOU) for being my friend and helping me be the best person I can be!

** approved for publication by "an old friend"